*NOTE: You’ve got to play the music before reading. Gives it more feel. Enjoy the song Gid, You can get me back soon;)
Seventeen
A year ago, I couldn’t have been happier for you. It was such a worthwhile experience, one that I’ve carefully marked on my wall of memories. I gave it my all, I poured out my heart for it, though I was less significant, less vibrant than yourself, I was happy to make the once a week sacrifices. Sacrifices - You made lots of them I have to say. I would gladly tag along, somehow or another, make time, make way just for both of you. I remember dressing in rags (except for that photo taking session you had that specific day:P), eating like pigs before, during, and after service! I recall watching the rest of Brunei life move on from the skies, gazing from that square window in the toilet and glass windows. I still remember the rude remarks, though they were exceptionally SUPER mean, heck, we laughed anyway:x It came to a point where we got questioned by our superiors which was funny yet freaky. I don’t remember the number of trees you killed, trying to make that particular origami, but it was a smooth move I have to say, was proud of you. It was the one of the things we had in common.
It’s a regular subject we talk about, this post subject. We like to read this book over and over again despite the torn pages, faded writing, and painful context, at the end of the day we carry on with our lives and put aside the book for next time. We go on about the whole “blinded by love” thesis, what it cost us, how love drives us nuts. Presently, you’re alright; much better off than people like me. Actually, time to time the distance may be hurting though I’d have to say it’s nothing compared to my past. In moments like these, I wouldn’t mind switching places. You could return & I could leave. Even better, we could just have an early reunion. How perfect it would be we always say, if you were here or if I was there.
T’was sad you didn’t tell your story. I could have, but it wasn’t my story to tell. I wonder what life would be like if you did huh? Much different I reckon. If only they were more willing to listen, more knowledgeable to not base it all on a single person, to want you to do more than give in. You’ll never know I suppose. After all, it doesn’t even matter. Letting go is done, moving on is current. After all, ABC’s are all around, though not all of them are good enough;x Who am I to choose my love? In the end, it all comes down to God’s plan. God’s picture. God’s chosen one. God’s best for me.
Eighteen
A day difference; didn’t mean much, but I thought it was pretty cool. Well, the difference brought us closer I think. Surprised I even remember eh? Well you did too, just got your numbers mixed up;p Always were forgetful you;p Better keep count! You might just upset your next “princess/poofy” BAHAHAHAHAHAHA
And it doesn’t get better than that;) love you bro
Nineteen "All endings are also beginning. We just don't know it at the time..."
2 months in a bit. Seems so much more, more than the times together. Not much to say really. Occasionally, there’s the usual automatic playback, stimulated by just talking a walk down memory lane, happy moments that end with nothing but a dead dream. They say stuff, I hear this and I hear that, it frustrating. I gladly listen though because it’s basically harmless to me with the exception of that bitterness which comes and go, constantly bombarding my mind with negativity. At times, I hate & I curse. What I hear isn’t the first time I’ve heard it and I’m sure it won’t be the last. It was known even before but never confirmed. People just don’t listen I guess. I can never our favourite line – “the truth hurts” Especially hearing it from others. It’s a lesson I’ve learnt too well that I know the consequences inside out. Some are just different, less humane? Missing a heart piece perhaps? I don’t know. But what I really need is not an explanation, just confirmation. And I need it from you. I can’t say it’s cool with me until what has to be said is said. Is there really nothing left? Let it go you say. FORGET IT. I will sooner or later. I don’t need time as much as I did before, all I need is you. Deep inside I know it, I’m just scared to admit it. Scared to swallow it in, afraid to face the agonizing fact. I can’t wait till christmast(: I can’t wait till then”
"Have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time when you thought they would be here forever? If so, then you know you can go your whole life collecting days, and none will outweigh the one you wish you had back…"
No one died, but it sure felt like it. It still does too.
Till’ then”
Posted by – hiddengangs
Ps. Literally, I think today I’ll be watching my past unravel once again, accept that this time round, it’s a little different.
Pps. The last quote of the post, when I pertained to it, it was however literal in a sense.
Quotes taken from: “for one more day” and “the 5 people you meet in heaven”- Mitch Albom (see previous post)
